School starts again in a few days

My last semester.

or, at least my last at UPS. Not gonna let myself get all nostalgic quite yet, but I really can't believe how fast the last three and half years have gone by.

I'm excited for things to get going again. It will be nice to have people on campus again and be able to call someone up when I am lonely and bored and not rely solely on my laptop for companionship. I am taking three classes for credit, as well as auditing the 310 fight lab and STF (my thesis) of course. So in total that makes five classes, work and once we get going, rehearsals. Woohoo, welcome to real life once again. No more sleep for Alyson! Nah, I like it better that way. I get so lazy when I sleep in. I have not done anything productive for weeks now, its time to get back to normal.

On top of all this, I have fully completed my graduate school applications for The Theatre School at DePaul University in Chicago and the University of Alabama at Tuscaloosa. Now, I wait. I have a better chance of getting into UA, though DePaul is perfect. So perfect in fact, that they only accept two people each year. And I'm good, but damn. So Tuscaloosa it is. Guess I better learn how to like football, apparently its like air to them down there. So much for never being dragged to another game against my will ever again.

In the meantime, to take my mind off of admissions committees scrutinizing my applications and resumes, I am in full research mode for Terra Nova, the show I am working on for STF.

Soon I will be a walking encyclopedia for all things Robert Scott and the South Pole. Penguins, seals, sled dogs, ice floes and burgs included. Ship and Royal Navy procedures as well. Oy.

I am excited for this thing to stop being research and start being a show though. I can't wait for auditions and then rehearsal. I need to be involved in something again, I'm going a little stir crazy.

I still think of London often. My friend Katrina is there now and I am devouring her blogs and photos like crazy. It just stirs up in me the renewed desire that I have to return. Take the West End by storm perhaps. Wouldn't that be something.

sigh.

time for bed

So, after days of anxiously waiting to get home to Tacoma, I am finally here and now wondering what to do with myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm loving being back in my own space (and bed), but there is nothing to do. I've been swearing up and down that starting Monday I will lock myself in the library and go into serious Terra Nova research mode, but that still leaves this weekend and me with nothing to do. Ugh. And I thought things were supposed to be more exciting now that I have my own place and have turned 21.
I already cleaned, changed out all the burnt out light bulbs and deChristmasified (meaning to take down the decorations). My laptop has basically been on since I woke up this morning, but even it can only hold my attention for so long.
I was so desperate to get away from my family (that makes me sound like such a horrible person) and come back home I didn't think about the fact that I would be totally alone. At the time that sounded like the best thing in the entire world. And its not like I haven't done it before, I lived alone this summer. I'm now remembering how lonely that was. At least I had work everyday to at least relieve some of the boredom.
Oh well.
My time in Portland was quite nice. I got in the day of the freak snowstorm and stole outside once it got dark to snap some shots.





If you like these, be sure to check out my deviantArt page, where I keep all the stuff in my portfolio. scarletsaigon.deviantart.com

Happy new decade!

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Lived entirely by myself. No roommates, no parents, just me. It was lonely at times, but nice to know that I can be completely on my own and be ok.

02. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I've decided I am no longer going to be in the habit of making specific resolutions, but instead generally try to improve on the things I already do on a regular basis. My last years resolution however, was to be less boring. Not sure if I actually achieved that or not, you'd have to ask my friends.

03. Did someone close to you give birth?
nope

04. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes. RIP Heather, you are continually loved and missed

05. What countries did you visit?
Since I went country hopping in 2008, I took 2009 off.

06. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
I would like to have a lack of depression in 2010

07. What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Oh man, there were so many. I returned home from being abroad on New Year's eve last year, so that was pretty momentous. Others include doing Celtic Cross, my directing class one-act, turning 21, wandering the streets of Seattle with my intern family, wandering the streets of Seattle with Bryan, buying my car and signing the lease on my apartment.

08. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
Getting out of my after-abroad funk. It took awhile, but I finally feel like I am back to myself again.

09. What was your biggest failure(s)?
Not being more bold. I need to just suck it up and take more chances sometimes.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
oh yes. i had a crash course in Living With An Incurable Disease 101. not great fun I'm afraid.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My car

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Well this is hard because so many people have done such wonderful things for me but I must say Michelle Jones, fearless leader of the PBL crowd has been one incredible influence on my life and the lives of those around me.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My dad, but that's no surprise.

14. Where did most of your money go?
rent, utilities and my cell phone bill

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Everyone coming home after a summer in Tacoma alone

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
oh goodness, so many. Sons and Daughters I think, it was a summer anthem for Megs and I and then used for Skin. or anything by Kate Nash

17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?
100% happier.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
i wish i had been more spontaneous

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
worrying what everyone else thinks

20. How did you spend Christmas?
my mom, dad, brother, grandmother and uncle. it was nice and low-key

22. Did you fall in love in 2009?
I did not fall in love, but I did love.

23. How many one-night stands?
none, and its gonna stay that way. just not a one-night stand kinda girl

24. What was your favorite TV program?
How I Met Your Mother, hands down

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope

26. What was the best book you read?
The White Queen by Philippa Gregory

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Once soundtrack

28. What did you want and get?
A better grasp on what's to come next

29. What did you want and not get?
respect from a few people

30. Favorite film of this year?
Up In The Air

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I spend the day before my birthday at Sasquatch with Whitney and then spent my actual birthday driving to and from Spokane, though I did get to have lunch with the wonderful Matthew Jackson.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not falling into depression after coming home from abroad

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
I got slightly more fashion conceious after living in London, but still mostly jeans and hoodies

34. What kept you sane?
My amazing group of friends, I love them so much

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I'm pretty taken with Jonathan Rhys Myers, I have to say

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Prop8

37. Who do you miss?
everyone who's not with me now

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I would have to say Emily Leong or George, i pretty much adore them both

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
Just because you’re good at something it doesn’t mean that you are passionate about it. Always follow your heart. Thanks PBL

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

Hello Seattle, I am a manteray
Deep beneath the blue waves
Ill crawl the sandy bottom of Puget Sound
And construct a summer home
Hello Seattle, I am the crescent moon
Shining down on your face
I will disguise myself as a sleeping pill
And descend inside of you a

or

sitting in restaurants
thought we were so grown up
but i know now that we were not the people that we turned out to be
chatting on the phone cant take back those hours
but i wont regret cause you can grow flowers from where that used to be

sometimes I feel like I am loosing sight of all the people I thought I knew best in this world. Why do people have to change? Or at least, why can't I seem to change along with them? I feel like I am continually the same and am just watching the world change around me.

Where did he go? I don't recognize him half the time anymore. He's hanging out with people he never would have been caught dead with before and whom he has no business spending time around. He's picked up habits he never used to have and says things that sometimes just leave me speechless. I look at him some days and have no idea where he went and who is left in his place.

and it breaks my heart. Can't he see that? Can't he see that he is breaking my heart?

baby, it's cold outside

well, the last time I posted was the first weekend of senior year. Now is the last. my how time flies.

This semester was...different. I encountered many things I never thought I would. And am still going through many of them. We've made it through the first part of STF, announced and managed not to kill one another. That in itself is an amazing feat. I am working with Matthew and Bryan on Ted Tally's Terra Nova as dramaturg. Should be quite the experience.

I am learning how to manage my disease and not overload myself. Saying no is hard, but I'm working on it. Gotta keep that stress level to a minimum. Ha. Got through a nasty bout of flu without landing myself in the hospital, still pretty proud of that accomplishment. Still on a wide assortment of medications, but am managing them well. No liver or kidney complications so far!

Worked on four shows so far this year, so that has been keeping me busy. Did lights for both Town Crier and the UT Sketch Show, did props for The Skin of Our Teeth and directed my first show through the Directing Class One-Acts. All went very well, but am glad to have a bit of a rest before STF is in full production swing. I will probably do the sketch show again and may work on IMF but am not doing the mainstage this spring, which is our once-every-four-years musical.

My next big thing (after finals this week) is finishing up my grad school applications. I am applying to arts leadership/admin programmes at The Theatre School at DePaul University in Chicago, IL and the School of Theatre and Dance at the University of Alabama in Tuscaloosa, AL. Both will provide me with a nice culture shock outside of my beloved PWN and have great MFA programmes. It's utterly terrifying to think about next year, and as much as I love being here right now, I'm excited about what my future might hold. The thing most holding me back right now is the thought of all the people I will leave behind here in Tacoma. It breaks my heart to think about not having my beautiful friends around every day. I have been so blessed with the people in my life here.

Though I am doing almost 100% better than before, I still have these massive bouts of missing London. It comes over me in a wave and makes my heart ache. But all this tells me is that I must return someday, I really have no other choice. I left a piece of myself there and must one day go back to reclaim it.

Christmas is nearly upon us once again, and I am excited to spend it with people who speak English this year. I have been baking like mad and got my flat all gussied up with decorations. I'm even looking forward to going home for a week, though am sure will be glad to escape to Portland once New Year's rolls around. I am heading up the 29th or so, to spend Bryan's birthday (the 30th) down there with him and Jenny and then will probably stay around for another week or so before heading back up to Tacoma. I figure that if I am going to pay rent for January, I might as well actually be here. I will spend those two weeks doing intensive research for Terra Nova.

Not too much else to report at this time. Will try and be better about updating this thing, though I doubt anyone reads it anymore.

[massive] life update

it's raining.

hard

and though I've had fantastic music playing for most of the night, this is, currently, the most welcome sound.
i love the rain. I wouldn't be a true Pacific-Northwestern girl if I didn't. Now, thats not to say that I enjoy being caught in it unexpectedly (though that can be fun), but I love sitting in my living room or laying in bed, listening to it hit the roof, pitter-pattering away. I'm always reminded of that rain song in Bambi.
We had Log Jam (club and activities fair here at UPS) on Friday and it rained on and off throughout the whole thing. Most people were [understandably] upset. It was ruining their posters/signs and the blow-up toys needed to be taken down. I, on the other hand, loved every second of it. I felt that Tacoma was just giving a true welcome to all our new freshmen, and reminding them that this is what normal is like and not to get used to the sun.
___

Holy freaking-a.
I am a senior.
No more denying it. the shite has hit the fan. I am a week into my senior year of undergrad.
where, oh where did the last three years go?
my very first class this semester was our Monday STF meeting and that just completely cemented it. Though the majority of us have worked on STF shows before and basically know how it all works, there is something so very strange about being on this side of the process. And we have barely even begun!
I only have classes on Tuesday/Thursdays this semester (plus our two hours on Monday afternoons for STF). It's very strange. And long, as I have all three in a huge block from 9:30-14:00. That is a large chunk of time to be sitting and taking notes, let me tell you.
But, I am uberexcited about said classes this year. I am taking Directing, Theatre History III (we are focusing on Suzan-Lori Parks and August Wilson) and Passion-Based Leadership. It should be a good term.

____

I should have mentioned it a while ago I suppose (but then again, does anyone actually read this thing?) this summer I spent with a bunch of doctors, getting tested for various auto-immune diseases. It has been confirmed that I do have one, but since my blood results keep coming back either negative or inconclusive, I still don't have a firm diagnosis. Which has been exceedingly frustrating. I am on 5 different kinds of medication and as far as I can tell, the doctors keep going back and forth between early-onset RA or Lupus. Both suck. but what sucks more is not actually knowing which it is. People keep trying to tell me that simply having a name for it won't make a difference, but for me it will. It would put my mind so much more at ease, being able to name is awful thing that is (both literally and figuratively) tearing me apart. I am a 21 year old in an 80 year-old's body. and it SUCKS.

____

because of said aforementioned disease, I had to take an early leave of the internship I was doing this summer, which was awful because it was so much fun. I worked as the props master for the Taproot Theatre Company in Seattle (Greenwood area). I made so many amazing friends and really enjoyed doing theatre that was outside of UPS. It was nice to see that theses guys are doing what they love and making a living off of it. They were also so very supportive when I broke the news to them. They have my unending love and gratitude for all the compassion they showed me and all the great things they had to teach as well. I miss them everyday.

____

I can't tell you how excited I am to have all of my friends back on campus finally. Being in Tacoma without them here just constantly felt like something was missing. I kept in good touch with everyone, but it wasn't the same. I hated having my best friends so far away. Though V was close, I sadly didn't make it down to Portland at all. And Bryan wound up all the way on the East Coast, working at a boy's summer camp near Boston. Emily went home to California and Matthew was chilling in Spokane. Claire made it back to Northern Ireland, and though I missed them all terribly, I loved that they all got to have such exciting summers. I am also thankful that I had Megan here with me the whole time. We had many frozen-yogurt adventures. I would have gone crazy without her.

____

though there is a ton more to fill you in on dear readers (ha), it is now nearly 2:30 and I should get some much-needed sleep.

fresh dreams to you all.

holy crap, July is almost gone...

Highlights of the last week or so:

• Amelia and Travis are all moved in. I like having people around again, its nice to know I'm not going home to an empty house, yet again.
  
  
• My brother came for a short visit- he will not be invited back. what a little brat
  
  
• I got a new bed! It's a queen, which I am super stoked about as I have slept in the same twin for the last 15 years or so.
  
  
• Had to get a new distributor for Gloria (my Camry). 4 hours, $400 and a missed day of work later I was on my way. that is the second time this car has left me stranded in Seattle when I really needed to get back to Tacoma. Ugh
  
  
• Had a bunch of blood drawn and sent to a lab for a panel of screenings to find out what the hell is wrong with my joints. Hopefully it won't be anything too serious. I'm starting to get really scared.
  
  
• LOVING my Taproot intern family. We've been making an effort to spend more time together as interns outside of working with the kids and its been a blast. I could not have picked a better group of people to work with. I love them all. It will be sad to see the summer come to a close and have us scatter around the country again, back to our respective schools.
  Last Saturday we bummed around the Seattle Center for the Bite, then saw Smoke on the Mountain Homecoming at Taproot and finished the evening at the Pig'N'Whistle for a drink with Debbie, one of the musical teachers and the SM for SOTMH. Last night we walked in the Greenwood SeaFair parade with some of the little kids and then went down to Gasworks for a show that was celebrating the new moon. It was so much fun! We had a wild and crazy adventure getting down there, which involved much yelling at a GPS system we named Bernice. We finished up the night with burgers, fries and chocolate shakes at Dicks and quick visit to the Freemont Troll (though we need to go back in the daylight). All in all an excellent night!